Yesterday I read an article about baby turning seven months; the opening paragraphs said something along the lines of

You’ve finally got your baby into a great sleeping schedule then BANG then their teeth start to wake them.”


My heart sank, not because of the thoughts of teething; it was more the great sleeping schedule part.


Then yesterday evening I found Oisin’s Milestone cards and there it was top of the pile the “I slept all night card” – My eyes filled up with tears, I was very tired yesterday. Actually, I thought I was very tired yesterday but I think that most days.


Then the horrible sleep deprived voice in my brain piped up, she might never sleep all night. STOP IT!


You know when you meet people there are two types of conversation about kids and babies sleeping. The first is the question:


Does he/she sleep for you?  


There’s two answers to that question – Lie and say yes, that way you won’t have to listen to endless advice of how they mastered getting their kids to sleep all night or you can say ”NO” and then stand there for ten minutes listening to the advice nodding and saying,


“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh right, yeah I’ll try that”.


The second part of this conversation, if there isn’t advice, there’s a useless piece of information;


“Oh my daughter NEVER slept till she was about, oh how old was she when she finally started to sleep, Eh what was it? Oh yeah, I’d say she was a bout 17 and a half. Mind you she’s still not a great sleeper, she’s 42 now.”



Thanks for that, I’m already teetering on the edge, that’s perked me up no end.


So, back to these milestone cards.


To date I haven’t used the “I slept all night” card on either of my kids, but for very different reasons.


We missed that milestone with Ois – he just started sleeping through. It just happened and as you know, when something great like your eight or nine week old sleeps all night you don’t mention it because if you do, you’ll jinx it and they’ll start waking again – fact.


He’s been like that since, bed at 7.30pm and unless he’s sick or something, you won’t see him until 7am. We were spoiled with a night’s sleep from very early on. I know, I hate my smug full night sleep self too. However, hold your horses.

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Enter Hannah, even when I was pregnant, Hannah was active and in the last few weeks, she tee’d me up for not a lot of sleep. At all hours of the night, I would walk around our apartment or faff  around the bed trying desperately to find a comfortable spot. Then finally with one leg elevated, the other hanging off the side, a pillow under bump, on my side, arm under pillow, other waving in the air, I’d find the perfect spot and Zzzzzzz.


Hannah would get a message to her internal baby senses that Mammy had nodded off, so she would move and by move, I’m pretty sure she got wind of that planking fade cause she stretched herself out all the way across, then had a little dance.


I’d wake and just look at my busy bump “Hello, you in there?!?  Please, will you just cool your jets for 10 mins, plllleeeaaassse?!”


The party continued –


They’re ignoring me. I fear this may become a trend.


In fairness to her, she made her intentions known long before she arrived. I had time to acclimatise Joey however, did not.


The books say “Sleep when baby sleeps.” That works first time round, but on your second baby? Not as easy, toddlers have their schedules and they don’t read the baby books with the suggestions. If they did, we would be discussing potty training but that’s another days work. I did once tried to wrangle them both up to all have an afternoon nap, all three of us ended up in tears.


Hannah came home from the Coombe a fairly settled baby, but she never fed well. That is a whole other story for another day. I tried everything, all the tried and tested methods. As the weeks went by, she lured us in and began sleeping eleven to six am. Well, for week or two anyway.


I’d like to tell you Hannah’s “Sleep schedule”, Google told me she should have one but she decides, daily. Yes, I have read every conceivable shred of information, the amazing Lucy Wolfe has given me some one to one guidance and that is helping.


I say it’s helping  but I wrote that sentence yesterday, she had three bottles last night, lost the head and didn’t want anything or anyone. I don’t know why but in the midst of it all last night I actually said “Hannah, whats wrong, what do you need” – As you can imagine she gave me a full run down of what her emotional and physical needs where. Unfortunately for me I’m not versed in translating baby crying.


This morning I sent Joey three links to articles about sleep training, bottle weaning and how to pacify a sleep-deprived wife.


Also, we’re lucky, when she wakes, she chats, she’s most of the time she’s not screaming the house down. Please don’t make me regret writing that and jinx myself. Ideally, she would just like to stay asleep in your arms or somewhere around your person.


The sleep deprivation is really starting to kick in. I have to make notes in my phone to remind myself of everything. I am about four reminders off Breath in, Breath out.  You know that feeling when you find things you put in random places or you go into the kitchen and when you get there you have no idea why what you went to get in first place? That happens serveral times a day. Oh and my favourite is going up stairs to get something but when you get up there you don’t remember what it was. That’s a real treat. Then you are all the way down stairs and you remember what it was. I say that like I’m living in a huge house, it’s a three bed semidetached, I’m just tired and lazy.


When Hannah wakes during the night at whatever time, or times, we’re not walking the floors with a sick baby, trying to comfort colic or sooth an very unsettled infant. We are just playing the “find my dodie” game for an hour or two every night or feeding. It’s funny, sometimes during the day she will sleep through the loudest of noises. Try to leave and by leave, I mean creep out of her bedroom and BOOM, eyes open, wide-awake;


“HELLO, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?? Get back here and let’s chat, now where did I put that dodie? MAM, MAM. My dodie, ah ahhh, ahhh, ahhh, baaa, baaa. Ba, ba.”


I KNOW it won’t last forever, I hope. The milestone card is still in the pack and I’m sure when she finds her flow and sleeps through the night, no milestone card will be necessary mainly because I won’t remember where I put it.

So if like me, you’re thinking I just need a nights sleep, just one, please. I hear ya, I feel ya and our night will come, okay??

That said, I’m absolutely shattered. Excuse me while I go and retrieve the sellotape I just spotted in my fridge.

I’ve no idea how it got there.


S xx